lining up my fashion

ok.

i fuck up again. i'm broken for the same, same reason. i hate it. and that broken-hearted-emotion-stuff hits me to the rock bottom that i lose my appetite. i even starve myself because i want to take away the emotional pain. i know and i don't expect anyone of you to understand why the hell i do such hurting acts on my flesh and bones but just know that emotional pain is way, way painfuller than physical pain. i don't mind at all letting my tummy empty for more than 12 hours. i just couldn't get over the fact that i'm being hurt AGAIN.

so.

the obvious impact i get is my weight decreases massively. i haven't looked like a skinny one but people start to notice that my outfits are baggy and loose. even when i wear my kebaya, it doesn't fit me nicely. i now start to wear again my shirts and blouses which i used to wear back when i was in Auckland (i was diagnosed to suffer from eating disorder, hence my body was shrinking). i now eat less which i find it, is okay. what more, my budget is quite restricted now because i'm putting a huge amount to my savings for my future. i am told i'm being extreme - well, i don't care. one thing for sure, i run towards what i truly want. by hook or by crook, that's it.

anyway.

on a side  note, i look quite ok in a few of photos LOL

i don't know why i suddenly have this model-ish feeling hahaha

here are my work and casual outfits.

enjoy!

at times i need to rest my eyes, hence the nerdy look

about to feed my kids with extra knowledge on friday night

being a teacher requires me to be outstation too

and weekends are never that boring if i opt for outing

so loose, so don't care

the indian-malay-cultures combination

the palazzo drapes nicely, accentuating my figure

bosan dengan mayonis?

secara jujurnya, dah lama aku tak amek mayonis. kali terakhir, entah lah. mungkin dah setahun lebih aku tak merasa. ala, aku pun tak kisah sangat sebab aku bukan kemaruk makan mayonis.

there was one time, i was looking for a mayonnaise recipe because i wasn't sure how mayonnaise in market is produced. well, there are actually several stuff i made on my own. like, my home-made almond butter, my vegan patty burger, my sweet buns and my vegan spring-roll. i don't know why i've started to have this attitude - making home-made food. maybe because i know exactly what the ingredients are. and what's more important, the ingredients are guaranteed to be clean and healthy.

aku bercita, esok-esok aku nak bukak ladang sayur pulak. 

i wanna grow my own crops ouh !

ok, back to the mayonnaise recipe. i've got it. yet, it takes a lot of effort to make it. one thing about myself, i love easy-quick recipe, not the complicated-super-time-consuming. ufff, i don't want to waste my time in the kitchen. 

banyak lagi benda aku nak buat. contohnya - menonton cerita 'cinta jangan pergi' (lepas tu, aku meroyan sorang-sorang sebab bengang tengok khalil dan lea).

nak dijadikan cerita, i've found another alternative from a web (i can't remember which site it is - i should have taken a note next time so that i can cite it later). instead of using mayonnaise, why not using avocado?

sila ketahui - rasa avocado lagi berganda sedap dan berlemak berbanding sapuan mentega, mayonis dan keju. percaya la weeyhhh

baik lah.

ini adalah sarapan pagi yang sungguh mengenyangkan. dah dua hari aku makan sarapan ni dan paling utama, aku tak rasa bersalah langsung mentekedarah benda ni. mana taknya, jumlah pengambilan kalori untuk hidangan ni adalah 403 kcal (approximately 27% RDI - recommended daily intake). 

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bahan-bahan:

1. dua biji telur rebus (saiz kecik)

2. setengah biji buah avocado

3. garam dan lada hitam

4. biskut rye (4 keping)

cara-cara:

 1. rebus kedua-dua biji telur. i prefer hard-boiled eggs because the yolks are fully cooked. if they are soft-boiled eggs, the yolks are partially hard which looks more likely half-boiled eggs. i don't like it anyway.

2. kemudian, asingkan putih telur dan kuning telur. cincang putih telur - tak kisah korang nak cincang hancur atau cincang kasar. aku suka kasar-kasar sebab bila makan nanti, macam puas tengok ada telur dalam pinggan.

3. sekarang, masukkan setengah biji buah avocado ke kuning telur. buah avocado ni, bila dah masak ranum, senang gila nak lecek. rasa pun sedap-sedap-lemak.

4. spring some pepper and salt. akhir sekali, baru campurkan bahan lecek dengan putih telur yang dicincang tadi.

5. tadaaaaaa ! kalau tak nak makan dengan biskut, boleh jugak makan dengan roti. tapi, nilai kalori bukan lagi 403 kcal lah. 

pesanan ringkas :

untuk menyimpan setengah biji lagi buah avocado, perahkan jus limau ke atasnya dan simpan dalam bekas kedap udara. pastu, masukkan dalam peti sejuk. boleh la bertahan sehari dua kott. tapi, untuk kes aku, takkan bertahan punya lah. esok pagi mesti dah habis.

aku syak buah avocado kat malaysia mesti mahal gila. kalau kat tanah auckland ni, paling mahal pun, NZD 2.00 sebijik. kira affordable for a student like me.

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this is my yesterday's outfit to class. as usual, it's from pumpkin patch.

oh ya, nak tahu satu perkara? 

kalau dulu aku pakai saiz 11 tahun kanak-kanak, sekarang aku dah mula pakai saiz 10 tahun kanak-kanak. yeahhh aku suka perasaan ni - dapat pakai baju yang makin lama nombor saiznya berkurangan wakakakaka !

project runaway - episod satu

sebab figura aku dikategorikan petite, agak susah sikit sebenarnya untuk berfashanista (apakah punya word ni). ye lah, aku tak boleh simply adopt any fashions kan. like, it may seem to be nice on that person's shoulder, but definitely not on me. boleh jadik aku bikin fashion disaster kang.

maka, seperti yang dulu telah aku bilangkan, bila kita terdesak, otak ni sedaya upaya merungkaikan idea-idea kreatif. proses nak carik idea tu, bukan lah macam epal menurut graviti sepuluh newton. mesti lah dialaskan sedikit research supaya idea-idea kreatif boleh tercetus bak bunga api dalam video firework katy perry. but then, wajib aku senandungkan fesyen-fesyen yang ada dengan prinsip hidup aku. pilihan utama imej yang aku study - casual. it's either boyish or girlish casual. maksud aku kat sini, kalau boyish, it's more on wearing pants, sneakers and shirts. kalau girlish, it tends to be long denim skirt, blouse, wedges and few accessories.

of course i won't go for women's fashion walaupun umur aku dah duapuluhdua. the point is not to accord your age when you're dolling up yourself. since i'm petite, i should have to choose something yang fresh, young and chicks. agaknya, sebab tu lah aku selalu lupa yang aku ni dah tua kott?

1. roxy ryan

walaupun aku suka attitude jane ryan compared to her sister - roxy ryan - tapi, bab pakaian dia, i may not to adopt it. satu, sebab outfit dia formal. and dua, outfit dia bersifat matang. so, i don't really like it. on the other hand, roxy nampak lebih kena dengan taste aku. simple and casual. plus, she suits herself with her brown satchel. that's something yang - genius.

aku deducekan, roxy's outfit is :

1. t-shirt

2. jeans

3. flip-flop

4. satchel

5. wrist band

and, i tried an experiment on myself with my own touch.

here's what i had :

1. t-shirt

2. straight-cut pants

3. sneakers

4. handbag but wore it like a satchel

5. apple necklace

6. shades

2. hermione granger

she is totally a all-rounder !

it's either she can style herself as a lady (girlish) or something that is more boyish. but of course, i opt for her boyish style for my normal days. kalau ada event, baru consider her lady-like fashion (referring to the yule ball dress). since harry potter chronicle's getting more adventurous, hermione can no more wear robe and skirts. so she needs to wear clothes that'll suit her with dirt. aku mula study her fashion starting from harry potter and the prisoner of azkaban until harry potter and the death hollow. good thing, hermione gives me more idea on winter clothing. jadik, aku konklusikan, pakaian kasual gadis sihir bijaksana ni adalah :

1. tank/tunic/tops

2. cardigan/hoodie

4. denim jacket

5. jeans

6. sneakers

7. satchel

dan untuk musim luruh serta musim sejuk :

1. knitted wear

2. boots

3. scarf

4. winter coat 

3. karen murphy

pada aku, karakter karen pada awal plot bukan lah seorang gadis tahan lasak. jadik, baju dia lebih ke arah kegadisan. tapi, disebabkan dia dah tersangkut dengan nathan harper, everything's changed. situasi kritikal memaksa dia untuk memilih fesyen yang lebih agresif dan mencabar.

tak banyak benda yang aku dapat kutip daripada karen sebab abduction lebih berkisar soal kejar-mengejar dan emosi cemas-panik. so, mana ada masa nak salin-salin baju. secara keseluruhannya, karen got five different outfits, but there are two main clothes she wore, 1) the moment she went to nathan's house which was invaded by the so-called investigators from the bridgewater juvenile justice department, 2) the moment she had to run away with nathan from CIA agents and kozlow's people.

sebagai gadis high school, karen bukan seorang bimbo. fesyen dia simple. here's my study on her outfits :

1. t-shirt

2. casual coat

3. jeans

4. checkered shirt

5. boots

6. satchel

to wrap up everything, i think all of their fashions revolve around "less is more". so far, aku tak berani nak pakai yang sarat-sarat. dan kerana terhadnya item-item yang aku ada, aku kena jadik kreatif. kakak pernah cakap dengan aku dulu - nak buktikan diri ni kreatif ke tidak, cuba guna barang yang sedia ada. abah pun pernah kata, sifat kreatif lebih terserlah bila kita pandai dan reti kurangkan kos, bukan menambahkan kos. jadik, kalau aku nak shopping any item, i have to consider its practicality. contohnya, my satchel. most of my photos, ada satchel tu. also, my sneakers and mary jane. tak salah nak recycle-kan apa-apa yang ada dalam closet. yang penting, pandai nak kenakan dalam gaya yang berlainan.

ok, next entry will be about the do's of petite girls' fashions. ini baru brainstorming dengan idea-idea je. lepas ni, aku betul-betul buat eksperimen mix-and-match and we'll see how it goes.

nampaknya, kena mintak bantuan nad sebagai jurugambar dalam projek ni. ihik !